Shadow on the wall

Shadow on the wall

Monday, July 27, 2009

Extreme Black - Personal disorder and 8 signs to look for


Relationships have their challenges even when the dynamic is healthy and the partners are mentally balanced. However, these challenges become nearly insurmountable when one of the partners suffers from a personality disorder. These disorders, among them narcissism, sociopathy, and psychopathy, are fundamental differences in the hard wiring of the brain or personality. Thus, they are virtually untreatable and cause enormous amounts of destruction in a relationship. If you are bewildered, confused, and hurt by the destructive actions of your partner, it is possible that their incomprehensible behavior may stem from a personality disorder. While only a licensed mental health professional can diagnose a personality disorder, here are 8 signs to look for:

1. Lack of remorse. A person with a personality disorder such as sociopathy and psychopathy lacks the conscience most of us possess. They will not experience guilt as we do. They may mimic the emotion, or be upset to be caught, but true remorse is absent. They may even believe the victim "deserved" to be exploited or hurt because they were weak or dumb enough to be taken in.

2. Lack of empathy. This is a common traits of narcissists. They are unable to put themselves in someone else's shoes. As a result, they may appear to be callous and self absorbed.

3. Lack of impulse control. Instant gratification is important for those with personality disorder. This can lead to destructive compulsive behaviors in the realm of drugs, alcohol, and sex.

4. Grandiose sense of self. Your partner may exaggerate accomplishments, behave in a haughty manner, look at others with disdain, expect preferential treatment, and expect to associate with "special" people or institutions.

5. Manipulation, conning, and compulsive lying. Your partner may be exploitative, taking advantage of you and others. They may live a parasitic lifestyle, taking all they can. In addition, they may lie constantly about everything and anything.

6. Consistent irresponsibility. Your partner may have difficulty holding down a job, paying bills on time, or meeting other commitments.

7. Propensity for violence. Your partner may have angry outbursts, and have a tendency toward violence, though not all psychopaths or sociopaths are violent.

8. Extreme black and white thinking. Your partner may be preoccupied with thoughts of ideal love, beauty, or power. They may also view you either as perfect and amazing, or worthless and terrible, with little in between.


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